Life

There was a time that I had a wonderful plan for the way my life should go, and up until a point, my life seemed to follow the path I carefully prepared for myself and my family. Then starting January 2005, life started throwing curve balls. Curve balls financially, curve balls with Shayne's jobs,our homes, health, family moving, and my personal hardest curve ball to endure; our infertility. Even though I am a very positive person, I was starting to feel like we were lost in a dark tunnel, struggling to find a way out.

Three years later....

When Shayne started school in 2008, I started to see a SPECK of light at the end of that tunnel. I knew that the end of that tunnel was still far off, but it was nice to finally see somewhat a direction to go, and that one day we would be in the sunshine again. I was satisfied just in knowing that if we kept going, that we would one day make it out.

Then last summer, a miracle happened. Our old infertility doctor (the only one we've ever been able to afford) was re-opening his practice that December! Our speck of light was growing again! I KNEW that with his help we could get pregnant, and I was thrilled for this. We started our fertility vitamins just as he would have suggested.... LUCKY FOR US we didn't need more help than that. The vitamins helped enough that we were finally able to get pregnant. Yes, we were thrown another curve ball when I had pregnancy problems but just knowing that I COULD get pregnant was something to be said. Lucky again, Kaitlyn stayed with us!

Another curve ball came when Shayne's business closed its doors and he was laid off last November. But, it seemed to open other doors as he started using his time to make a website that we are extremely hopeful about.

This week alone has been such a happy one. Shayne has at least three interviews from Friday to next Wednesday and I'm sure one of them will be a hit. I can't wait for him to get back to work. Also I've always said that I wanted to move this summer before Ellie needs to be enrolled in Kindergarten. With Shayne getting a job again, we can start planning for this wonderful move (hopefully into a rent to own home in Spanish Fork or Salem area). Also we WILL be ready for Kaitlyn when she comes thanks to our upcoming tax returns, another happy thought. Oh and just last night, my mom called and told me that she is moving back to Utah possibly as early as April. I have missed having my parents around during these difficult times.

The light is getting brighter everyday. It won't be long before we'll be out of this tunnel and back to greener pastures. I feel it now more than I have in YEARS! I am celebrating this to myself. I can honestly say again that I am excited and hopeful for our future!

"...By small and simple things are great things brought to pass." Alma 37:6. I have since learned that while plans are great and a good thing for any family, you can't be surprised or disappointed if life takes you in a different direction. We all have our curve balls, and now I realize the truth in the saying, the only thing constant is change. I also realize that compared to other families, looking back, it doesn't seem like we've really had it that hard.

In closing, I know that I have SO MUCH to be grateful for. I'm so thankful for my sweet little family, Shayne, Kaitlyn, and Ellie, and that no matter what we have been through we've never done without - even in the hardest of times. I'm grateful for our our health, and that even during our worst times health wise that they were all correctable ones. I'm grateful to two great families, the Munn's and Burrows/LaTurner family, for always being there for us and supporting us and sometimes helping us along the way - some even from a distance. I'm thankful for the church and the hope and love I've always felt there. I am thankful for a Heavenly Father that I know loves and blesses me and my family and is always watching over us. Even during these past 5 very hard years, I still feel that I'm one of the lucky ones just to know the things I know and have the best family I could have asked for.I'm sure they'll still be curve balls in our future just as there are in any family, but I know that when they come, we can handle them together. :)

28 Weeks

28 weeks already. Looking at the picture of me at 7 months, I have to wonder if I'll be smiling in my 8 and 9 month pictures. I'm praying to NOT gain 30 pounds of water this time! The "fun" of pregnancy is in full blast. So much to look forward to with our new baby girl coming and so ready to feel "myself" again once the baby is born. I'm always saying "things we do for our children," and well, I'm living it right now. Having Ellie, and now Kaitlyn makes everything I do seem worth it though.

On a positive note, I saw my heart doctor last week. After wearing a KING OF HEARTS monitor for two weeks, we did catch some very fast SVT-like (Supra Ventricular Tachycardia) rhythms like I had been experienced in the past before my AV Node Ablation in 2006. Well, Dr. David Wang seems confident that this time it's because of the pregnancy and NOT because I have SVT again which was a huge relief! He believes it will resolve when Kaitlyn is born. I have an appointment in June to follow up with this.

Ellie has been adjusting great to the thought of having a baby sister - most the time. We have to laugh that her room is being slowly taken over by baby boxes and various baby things and she is NOT HAPPY about this one bit. She knows that babies cry often and is VERY APPREHENSIVE about having a swaking baby sharing a room with her (even though I reassure her that the baby will sleeping with us for the first few months). She also keeps telling me lately "Mommy that baby sure is getting big!" She's never failed to notice some my fun pregnancy whoa's too... one time she pointed out that my face looks gross (meaning my pregnancy acne). I had to laugh even though at the moment I wondered "do I really look gross?"

Ellie had a big achievement in January as she passed her preschool spelling test for the first time. Since she has been in preschool this school year her teacher, Mrs. Roper, has been giving them monthly spelling words to work on. I have to admit, that at first (because of my difficult start to this pregnancy, fatigue, etc) I didn't work on the spelling words with her as much as I should have. Then in November when I got feeling better, I worked on them every other day to couple of days. She didn't pass the test that month which she took extremely hard, and I took most of the blame for myself. :(

After Christmas break, we started practicing her new words for January faithfully. We made games out of it; to see how many she could write before the buzzer went off, shuffling them up and making it into a flash card game, etc. We worked on them every night but Sunday. I was starting to get worried around mid January that she wouldn't pass again. We started testing her ourselves, and by the end of the month - she could do them perfectly! Check out the picture. I think it says it all. That day we went to McDonald's for lunch to celebrate, and when Grandpa came for a visit a week later we celebrated again at Chuck E Cheese. She has been taking February just as seriously and I KNOW she'll get 100% again! Oh and did I mention - everyone in her class got 100% too that week (apparently she wasn't the only one to work harder that month), and they had a class party known as CrAzY DaY! Ellie loved dressing up crazy for school. Overall, our hard work paid off and I'm so proud of her (and us!) for this big achievement.

We have so much to look forward to in March. I've enrolled Ellie in to a ballet class at THE CENTER in Provo. She will take those classes Monday's and Wednesdays for about an hour. She loved ballet last year, and I've really felt bad that we couldn't afford to put her in one this year. I hope this sorta makes up for it. :/ I've been thinking about putting her in a swim class before the baby is born as well. I'll be glad when it warms up a little more and Ellie can start playing outside regularly again too. For me, other than being excited for the new baby, I can't wait to start another garden. I'm planning a salsa-in-pots garden this year to make things easier and something we can move to another home - just in case.

Shayne's still looking for work and going to school. He's keeping busy at home though working on a potential new website to be revealed later. I hope that it will help provide a supplemental income at the very least, and help me to stay home with the kids instead of going back to work when Kaitlyn is born. He's got just over a year left in school, and I know his graduation will be a very happy day for the Munn family. Hallelujah!

That's the update for now. My next appointment isn't until March 22, and my next ultrasound March 19. 32 weeks. :) Until next blog - ciao!!!