Wearing Out Her Welcome ;)

This ENTIRE pregnancy - the goal has been to KEEP KAITLYN IN MY BELLY. From the very start, it was a battle to have this baby join our family (beginning with trying to conceive even). We struggled at 5 weeks pregnant with an infection, again from 6 to 12 weeks when we found out that we had a blood clot in the placenta, then once the clot dissolved it was a matter of avoiding it coming back, and now low fluids after 32 weeks; it seems we have tried desperately the entire 9 months to save her unborn life. Now ironically enough, we can't get her to come out. I am 39 LONG WEEKS pregnant, and I am not making much progress.

As of yesterday, I found out I was dilated to a one.... or should I say BACK (!) to a one. The week before I was a two. At a two, I was so happy because this is something I didn't do with Ellie. In fact, pregnant with Ellie I was a one at 37 weeks and I assumed that I would have her early. Every checkup with Ellie after that, no change; right up to the 41st week when I was FINALLY induced. It's hard to imagine going into labor or having my water break when I found out that I am back at a one this week. Ha ha, part of me worries that next week I will go from a one back to a ZERO.

Lucky for ME though, my doctor said that he doesn't like his patients to go past their due dates. So, at the very latest, I will be a new mommy again by next weekend. PRAISE HEAVEN!

Don't get me wrong; I know that I will miss being pregnant after she comes out. After trying three years to get her here and the nine months to make her, I have to wonder if Kaitlyn is my last baby. I am trying with all my might to enjoy these last days with Ellie by herself, and enjoy Kaitlyn while she is still in my womb. It's not easy to endure my pregnancy woes (such as going to the bathroom 3-4 times a night, drinking 2 gallons water daily to keep fluids up, being so big that I drop virtually everything I eat on my belly, the feeling of total fatigue, not to mention the things I CAN'T mention) but I know they will be over soon. Sometimes I think Heavenly Father designed the most uncomfortable trimester to be the last one so that the mother can be not only READY but WILLING and WANTING -some BEGGING -to give birth in the end. Somehow, the actual childbirth process seems less of a fearful thought than enduring another SECOND being as big and uncomfortable as you are at that moment.

Right now we are trying to maintain and live a normal life however possible in hopes that time will fly by faster this way. So - I will enjoy my baby shower Saturday, and Mothers Day this weekend. Tuesday, May 11th, I will find out the exact time and date that I will be induced if this is needed. I can't wait to post a blog about Kaitlyn. Hopefully - that will be my next one. :)