Now Is As Good a Time as Any

(Yes- those are positive! It's faint but it's there!)

(Written Sept 7, 2009 - POSTED OCT 2, 2009)

About a month ago (August 2008)- I could tell that my luck was changing. August 8th was my six year anniversary with my handsome husband. We had a fabulous day together. He surprised me with some diamond earrings I had been asking for almost four years or maybe even longer. Then, that night, at the show Cirque Du Solieli I won tickets to see the show again the next day! 418 people entered the drawing and MY NAME was chosen! "How strange" I thought - "I'm feeling more lucky lately."

Surely, my Grandpa Gordon passing away was not what I would consider lucky, but everything else was starting to go my way.

You should also know that when we got pregnant with Ellie, it happened during a very sad time in our lives. Shayne's Grandma Elthora Underwood passed away, and two weeks later, we found out we were pregnant. We always joked that Grandma Elthora sent Ellie down to us (and Ellie is a partial name sake of her and my father Dan - elle). I started to joke (and wonder )that Grandpa Gordon would send down a baby for us to.

I even had a dream around that time I was taking a pregnancy test and it was positive. I started getting my hopes up. A while later I found myself falling asleep during one of our favorite TV shows, and became more confident that MAYBE this month. MAYBE.

The morning I took the pregnancy tests was a morning I'll not soon forget. I had bought the tests the day before (I wasn't even LATE yet) and decided to take them the following day. That morning I kept saying to myself, "I don't know if I can handle another NEGATIVE test!" But, I sucked it up and took it anyway. I have to admit that for about 20 seconds, I watched it.... after a little while, I resolved that it was probably negative again or it was too early to tell because it already seemed clearly negative. I left the bathroom with the test still on the counter almost giving up on the hope I had for the month. A few minutes later, I went back.....

AND

I have some news..... WE ARE PREGNANT, Due May 15,2010 or around there. After 3 years of heartbreak, we find ourselves PREGNANT! Right now, I am about 5 weeks, and I haven't told anyone yet (except Shayne - not even Ellie knows!) and I don't plan to start talking for a while but we are very excited and are welcoming the changes we know are happening. Part of me is in a state of major disbelief. It's easy to not tell you all at the moment because I am still trying to convince myself that YES THIS IS HAPPENING. Three years in the making - we are finally expecting again.

I told Shayne that morning. If I would have been thinking I was pregnant, I might have told him a more memorable way than, "SHAYNE SOMETHING WEIRD IS HAPPENING! I JUST TOOK THAT PREGNANCY TEST, AND IT SAYS POSITIVE!!!!" He said, "Did you take the second test?" I took the second test, and it confirmed it again. We were extremely overjoyed.

That morning, I decided to take a long walk while Ellie was in preschool. I remember looking up towards the heaven and taken back with tears, thanking Heavenly Father for trusting me with another of His children and for this baby finding it's way to our family. I really find it ironic that someone died both times I got pregnant, but I feel special that during the hardest of times, that I am being watched over.

I'm sure now that the word is out - we will have many blogs about this upcoming BIG news, and I'm sorry in advance if it gets old but I wondered if we would ever have children again and I'm still unsure if we'll have anymore after this one, so we are going to enjoy every moment - even the morning sick ones.

We have truly been blessed and I am so thankful.